Car seat poos were also better known as gurgle poos because they were prefaced by a gurgling sound like trapped air making its way round the central heating system. The gurgling was the preface to a thing of true horror, culminating it the truly unforgettable gurgle poo of Wells Next the Sea Square. Imagine slightly runny smooth peanut butter, covering all of his bottom, his boy bits, more or less right down to his feet. Covering a fair part of the car seat, and eventually up to both our elbows. It took most of a packet of baby wipes to sort that one out.
The wee lass has been a lot better. Partly because she's such a voracious eater, she tends to do lots of smaller, denser poos.
That's why I commented to wifey in the car. Unfortunately she was listening. And plotting.
The wee lass likes a good play in the bath, so I thought she was just sighing in contentment until I saw the king size Mars bar she'd produced drifting serenely towards the tap. There was a look of smug satisfaction on her chops as I hastily removed her from the bath...
My god I'm crying with laughter at that. I know those poos, the runny ones- Chrissy did one once as Ed lifted her out the baby bath, covering his favorite pair of Diesel jeans- except he was so concerned by not dropping the wriggling wet mass of baby daughter and with getting her flat on her change mat on the floor, he didn't notice, and I didn't tell him for about five minutes! He has never worn those jeans since.
ReplyDeleteVery funny and colourfully written.
ReplyDeleteI once decided to let my eldest son have some "nappy free time" at the very same moment I made the observation (to myself) that "he hadn't done a poo that day". Unfortunately these two thoughts didn't meet and have a beer together.
The result was him crawling up to me a few minutes later, stopping every few steps to look at his hands in abject horror - like he was Lady Macbeth himself - if Lady Macbeth had pooed herself and then spread the stuff all through the house, that is.