Stratagems and ploys

Having one of each in the child department at the moment, it’s interesting to see the difference between boys and girls. One of the two things they obviously have in common is an overriding desire to have their own way. All of the time. But the differ in their approaches to it. Oh, to be sure, they share somethings in common, the rolling on the floor and shrieking is probably the most popular but then they are two and four so a modicum of tantruming is to be expected I suppose.

Fifi takes a very pragmatic approach. She will ask, when told no, her bottom lip will come out and she’ll proclaim “Want to!” loudly and then proceed (repeatedly) to attempt to do whatever it is she’s not allowed to. This will continue until you either get worn down and let her do it or lose your temper. Point to note: if you lose your temper you can guarantee that Fifi will have lost her temper by then. She has also been know to do that drama queen thing of throwing toys and things around too. My, she has a temper on her. When she gets really cross I like to pick her up and hold her at arms length, arms and legs windmilling in inarticulate rage. Makes me chuckle.

Fifi is also equipped with feminine wiles though. And she is experimenting with using them. The other day the phone at my desk rang. I picked it up to have a very upset Fifi talk to me for over 4 minutes, demanding that I come home and give her a cuddle because she missed me. What she actually missed was the biscuit that she’d been refused.

The boy is more typically a boy. If asking doesn’t work, shouting is the next step. If shouting until he’s purple in the face and sweaty doesn’t work, physical violence or attempts to storm the room containing the object of his desire are the next step. Occasionally, just occasionally he uses cunning. I’m still impressed when he walked in with a fully made cream cheese sandwich. He’d taken a chair into the kitchen, raided the bread bin and the fridge and got busy on the bread board.

Wifey is better at stopping the escalation to violence. She uses distraction techniques much better than me to diffuse situations. I almost always work it towards a show down which inevitable causes problems in the short term.