Vegetable avoidance tactics taken to another level

The eldest doesn’t like vegetables. He’s happy to eat fruit, and there are some veggies he’ll scoff but some are completely off his dietary agenda as far as he’s concerned.

This is odd as he loves Italian food, particularly pasta with a nice tomato and beef sauce. He will eat around any pieces of tomato and diligently manage to leave all the onion and pepper on the side of his plate though. That takes some effort

The weekend saw his attempts to divert attention from the lack of vegetable consumption to a whole new level and it went a little something like this:

Boy: If you have to be stranded on a desert island with one fruit and two movie stars, who would it be?

Us: …

Boy: I’ll start. I would have a pear as my fruit and Michael Cera and Harrison Ford as my two movie stars.

Ned: A Mango! And a Banana! And Spider-man!

[enthusiastic but only just 5, Ned hadn’t quite got the hang of this one].

Boy: Of course if you can only take one thing to a desert island, you should always take a boat.

Me: I’d take celebrities who like eating vegetables, are you going to eat your peppers?

Boy: Noooooooooooooooooooooo.

You have to be able to stay on target in this parenting lark and not get easily distracted. This is difficult as I am exceptionally easily distracted. For example I woke up this morning and decided I had entirely dreamed up the Gopher file transfer protocol because i) it seemed too far fetched to be real and ii) I hadn’t heard of it in around 20 years. So rather than getting up and ready for work at 7am, I was instead reading Wikipedia and deciding that Gopher was real and I wasn’t going mad. Except now I think I might be going mad because who does that?

I blame the vegetables.